The Artist’s Way

As many of you already know, I am not of the Bridget Jones persuasion. I have never believed that over analysing things is beneficial and as such, never really got into the ’self-help book revolution’. However, there comes a point when you’ve tried everything else and this is the only thing left. And sometimes, apparently, it’s the right way to go.

Since Christmas I’ve got stuck in a bit of a rut. A procrastination rut. I put things off in favour of something else, but then that gets put off in favour of something else and then I can’t do that til I’ve done something else first and so on.

The next thing you know it’s 8pm and you’ve done bugger all but faff about all day.

As someone who now relies 100% on self-motivation to pay the rent, this could not carry on. I was bored with not getting things done, frustrated with not being able to make a decision and downright cranky to boot. I’ve tried a few different things over the last 2 months, but they all seemed to make things worse. Breaking multitudinous tasks down into ‘bite-size chunks’ just creates even more tasks for you to faff over not doing. Having a schedule goes to pot the minute you find that yes, you’ve scheduled finishing that project today but it’s not going to happen because first you have to go buy more ink. Or you over sleep.

I was getting to the point where I was getting frustrated, because procrastination is not something I’ve ever suffered from. I’m the sort of person who, given a deadline of ‘by next Friday’ will have it done and on your desk this Friday so I can take next Friday off. I do things now or at the very least, next,  because that’s what works for me. So after some 15 weeks of constant procrastination and getting very little done, I decided I needed to try a new approach.

Anam gave me ‘Vein of Gold‘ by the same author a few years ago, and as a read-through-be-inspired book I found it useful. I tried a chapter or two as a work-through book this time but couldn’t find anything relevant. Procrastination for me is not about being disorganised, fear of failure or fear of success. It’s about ‘not knowing where to begin’ because there’s to much to do. I used to have it when I worked full time and at those times I’d grab my to do list and go wild-eyed into Liz’s office and say “Help! I’m overwhelmed! Where do I start?” Which would result in her grabbing my to do list, crossing off about half of it as ‘unnecessary’ and re-organising the rest into an order with strict instructions to do this and this by the end of the day. It was a magic formula that always worked. So I knew I just needed somewhere (anywhere) to start and then I’d have the momentum to keep going.

Enter The Artist’s Way, forerunner to Vein of Gold. You can download the first chapter from Cameron’s website and get started with morning pages and artists dates without buying the book. I have the book on the way, because now I’m curious.

I have to say, for what I needed it’s worked like a charm. Knowing I have to get up and do my morning pages within 45 minutes of getting up has helped me get up and get doing something straight away in the morning that doesn’t involve vaguely checking email and getting lost in blogland. For the last 5 days I get up, clean my teeth and such, feed the cats, make a cup of tea and immediately sit with my book and just drivel onto the page. (The word drivel here is explanatory both of what I write and how I write it since apparently my handwriting first thing in the morning resembles hieroglyphics).  What I’ve found is that by the time I get to the third page, I’m awake, I’m alert, I’ve got my whinge out of the way (read: I’m totally not a morning person) and I’m already deciding what I’ll do next. That what I’ll do next has, so far, no resembled my logical to do list at all. It’s as if my brain is waiting til I’m busy writing to do it’s own to do list and working out what it feels like working on today.

For the first 4 days I went from my morning pages through my get showered and dressed cycle straight into ’sketch out some of that, do your 3 hour class, come home and clean 1/3 of a room, continue sketching some of that, art journal, relax. Day 5 was my ‘artist’s date’ where I spent the morning working on a class project (where I’m the student for a change), then went to see Alice in Wonderland (Tim Burton + Lewis Carroll = enough creative material for several weeks). In between I had lunch and took a 1.5 mile walk. No really. There was, like, exercising involved and everything. Day 6 involved setting up blog posts in advance, teaching a workshop, cleaning 1/3 of my studio lounge, then having an evening off and cooking a proper meal.

I feel energetic, motivated, I’m not longer frustrated or angry about making the  simplest decision and I’m getting things done whilst also finding time to relax and exercise. It’s as if doing the morning pages is my gateway into my to do list which, I might add, I have ignored all week. I know what needs to be done in my head and lately writing a to do list has become a practice in procrastination of the actual ‘do’ part. I’ve been adding them into my morning pages as I think of things, like a stream of consciousness. I read on the forums over on her website where someone said they found getting up in the morning ‘very disorientating’ and I knew immediately what they meant. That’s me. It’s like that feeling after you get off a roller coaster or a ship and you can’t quite work out where your legs go, but applied to your whole body and brain.

So, that’s where I’ve been this week. Taking some time out to figure out a way of working that really works for me and gets me doing things instead of thinking about doing things. Motivation, determination and creativity I have in bucket loads, but working out which bit to start with when I was on overload wasn’t happening. Since I’ve handed that responsibility over to someone else and my first ‘to do’ is set and void of decision making by me, I feel much happier and just get on with things.

I’ve got the book on order, should be here by Monday. I’m curious to see what the other 12 weeks of exercises are like. I enjoyed the Vein of Gold a lot, but it was too heavy and in-depth for my needs, but I’m assured that The Artists Way is a bit less taxing and do-able and with so much to catch up on I really need something that fits into my life. I’ll keep you updated as I go. I have a lot to accomplish over the next few weeks, not least of which is getting back to updating my blog regularly, so hopefully this is going to help there too. We’ll see shall we?

At the very least I’ve got a good foothold on two projects and a clean kitchen out of it.

Alice was Awesome

No spoilers that will ruin it if you haven’t seen it (unless you really don’t want to know what’s missing and who plays what)

The Cheshire Cat (Tim Burton/Disney Film Version)

The first bit was slow. It was fairly obvious that it was mostly scenery to wow the 3D viewers with (if you look carefully in the 2D you can see where the overlaps should be). But from the moment Stephen Fry wandered in as the Cheshire Cat (my favourite character from the book) and introduced Alice to Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter (my favourite character from the film), it picked up pace and became almost a different film.

‘Spot the celebrity’ was a fun pastime. The graphics and feel of the film was an interesting mix of Disney and Burton, which was intriguing to say the least, and it messed with the plot of the book in a new and interesting way that I actually enjoyed. It was also a strange mix of Wonderland and Looking Glass, with odd bits added in and even odder bits missed out (no mention of Dinah, the mock turtle, poor old bill, the missing gloves and fan, weeping a tidal wave or a trial).

It was a very peculiar mix, which put much more of the Hatter into the story, but then Johnny Depp pretty much carried the film for me. Anne Hathaway and Mia Wasikowska were OK, but I never liked either the White Queen of Alice herself very much. Helena BC was disappointingly banal as the Queen of Hearts with yet another twist on her wide-eyed-snipe-with-a-lisp character. I miss the days when all her characters were original and unique.

Overall, I enjoyed it though. I’m not a purist when it comes to squeezing a book and a bit into 108minutes, so the changes to the story were OK with me. I can see some being furious about it, especially how Alice is portrayed, but I liked this Alice much more than the insipid, whiny brat of the original book. They mashed up the original story a lot, but it works. Don’t go expecting a complete rehash of the novel and you’ll be fine.

One thing that bothered me is how ill Mia Wasikowska looked in the beginning. I thought at first that she looked emaciated and malnourished, however it occurred to me afterwards that it could be weird Burton-esque symbolism. When Alice is in the real world at the beginning everyone else looks normal and she looks like she’s at deaths’ door. (I was actually a little worried for the actress herself at one point). However, I noticed later that as she goes from being ‘Hardly Alice’ to ‘Almost Alice’ she becomes more normal looking whilst everyone else in Wonderland seems to take on a ‘bags under the eyes’ sort of look. I’m still not sure whether it’s a weird makeup/symbolism combo or whether maybe she actually was dog tired and in need of a good meal, and filmed the first bit of the film last. I’d be interested to know if anyone knows or has any thoughts on the subject.

Oh and for the record, I want to teach one or both of my cats to ‘evaporise’. Because it would just be such a neat trick. If they could also learn to talk and sound like Stephen Fry, that would be a bonus.

And I’m Back!

Thanks so much everyone for all the wonderful cards and birthday wishes. I spent my 38th having a lovely day out with family and friends, and have spent the weekend doing a few bits and pieces I needed to do for myself.

This is one of my birthday presents – a wonderful odds-and-ends collage-card in purple and black by my wonderfully creative friend Jaihn over at Truly Spacious.

'Rho Collage Card' by Jaihn @ Truly Spacious

© Anam Stubbington

And Anam made me a gorgeous scrapbook page with pictures of me and my fairy Goth daughter, Fay, from their Christmas visit. You can see the original here. I have such wonderfully creative friends, they always amaze me.

This week I’m a busy, busy little bee, finishing off the first of a series of 3 new workshops that open on March 2nd (more on that later), working on some journal pages for an offline workshop I’ll be teaching soon and putting together some workshop proposals and samples for a potential new venue near where I live. I also have 2 commissions to do (one of which is something of a monstrosity because it’s actually a set of pieces) and plenty of other things I need to catch up on, so the first two weeks of February are going to be somewhat manic. I do love being busy though, so it’s a great start to the year!

How To Make Someone’s Day in 140 Characters or Less

'Bear' approves of his new spot, right next to my chair

Yesterday I went up to Manchester and spent 3.5 hours with the lovely Gracey getting my dreads sorted out. Usually I can fully manage my hair myself, but I’ve been so busy I’ve been neglecting them and the painin my right hand has been too much to work all day and then spend time doing my own hair. The worse my wrists get the longer it takes and harder it gets for me to do my own maintenance, which resulted in a lot of mangling at the roots that I couldn’t sort out myself. They feel so much better now, albeit stuck out at weird angles(!) and I’ll be able to manage them myself again.

I’ve spent last night and today re-organising my studio/lounge.  Again. Yes, I know I did it over Christmas but that was more a mini-reorganisation of my desk. This time I moved everything. And I do mean everything, with the exception of 2 bookcases I’m saving for a whole other day.

The problem was I had my desk along the wall next to the door. This was opposite the window (which meant I couldn’t get any natural light in my videos due to shadows) and really drafty. I’ve been round the house with a candle trying to pinpoint that draft and I have no idea where it was coming from, but it meant that after an hour at my desk the whole of my right side was frozen. My wrists simply can’t handle the cold, so my right wrist permanently hurt and I had to start taking painkillers a lot more than I’m comfortable with i.e. outside of times I have a migraine.

Prompted by a new class that needs daylight, no creative urge whatsoever despite having work to do and this draft issue that I simply could not handle a minute longer, I moved everything. My desk is now by the window where I can get some natural light on my work and am out of the draft whilst still being able to watch TV. The sofa is behind the door, also out of the draft but in line with the TV (I’m not a huge TV addict, but I like to watch films to relax or while I art journal).An added bonus of the move is that right next to me is the left side of the sofa which is Bear’s favourite spot. I no longer have to disturb him by wheeling across the room to pet him.

I have no pictures because I’m on a tight schedule and couldn’t devote more than one evening and a day to it, so I need to clean thoroughly. It’s amazing how much crap can accumulate behind things like bookcases and computers. I won’t even tell you about some of the stuff I’ve found that’s fallen off the back of the desk in just 18 months.

Today, on Twitter, after mentioning this humongous undertaking just a few times(!), Sam said I was a ‘very hard working artist’. I told her I had to be – it’s what pays the rent. Here’s what she said back…

May be so, but you’re very good at what you do, and I feel happiness/ joy in the Spirit of your work! @samsart5

That is possibly the nicest thing anyone has said to me since I started to turn this this art-making thing I do into a viable business venture. That and the warm corner I now have to make art in (complete with kitty), have totally made my day.

On Creativity

Some of us just respond better to deadlines.